IT'S SO HARD TO PRETEND NOT TO LOVE A PERSON WHEN YOU REALLY DO.
Profile.
ELLA Tamara Bleszynski.
6 april 1993.
West Side.
Juying Secondary School.
O Level This Year.
A Dancer But Being An Actress Is My Biggest Dream.
NUTZCREW repp FunkyNutz.
Red & Adidas Freak !
Single But Unavailable.
Songs.
Tagboard.
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Archieves.
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Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Title; CALL MY NAME AGAIN~
 chatted with my dearest friend ,
Muhammad Firdaus , yesterday night .
it was great cuz its been awhile since we share everythin !
i miss hym alot cuz he's the one who always cheer me up ,
shouted my name ELLLLLAAAAA !!! whenever i walked pass
his class last year .
and he asked me if theres another person that shouted
my name lyke he do .
i said no ... :(
Firdaus is still Firdaus :)
a guy who is always very lovable , caring ,
respect all girls and funny in a way :D
thats totally him !
i hope youre doing fine ,
with your mates and omg , travel from boonlay to simei !
all the best travelling every morning Fird ! ;)
and the message you text me yesterday night ,
im so touched :(
i wish you all the best in your life ahead !
MUCH MISSES !! <3
and i miss Dinie Ramli too :)
and Ayim Rahman three :)
and Alif Azman four :)
and Kamsari five :)
and Sue Irziana six :)
and Jiliah Jimahat seven
OH MY CHINA MAN !
basically all of my classmates last year !! :(
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Monday, April 26, 2010
Title; ........ DO EXIST !
 I WILL BE STRONG ,
IN FACING ANY DIFFICULTIES ANY CHALLENGES AHEAD ME .
I WONT LET ANY OF MY TEARS FALL AGAIN ,
NEVER EVER AGAIN ! ( hopefully )
I MUST STOP THINKING ABOUT EVERYTHING ,
I MUST FOCUS ABOUT NOTHING ,
EXCEPT FOR MY STUDIES .
CUZ ONLY TODAY ,
I REALISED THAT ITS USELESS TO THINK ABOUT OTHERS ,
CARE ABOUT THEM , SHOW THEM SOME LOVE ,
BUT THEY DIDNT EVEN GIVE A FCUKIN CARE TO THEIR OWNSELF !
SO DISAPPOINTED , BUT THATS LIFE ELLA .
YOU MUST LEARN TO ACCEPT THINGS ALRIGHTS ?
JUST BE STRONG .
ELLA ,
NOW THAT YOU KNOW ABOUT IT ,
WILL YOU STILL WANTS TO GO BACK ON THE SAME OLD TRACK ?
WHERE ITS SO HURTFUL .
YOU CRIED NIGHT AND THEN .
TRYING TO FIND SOLUTIONS TO IT ,
BUT YOU FAIL TO DO IT EVERYTIME .
OR MOVE ON & CONTINUE WITH YOUR LIFE ?
CUZ YOU STILL HAVE A LONG WAY TO GO ELLA .
YOU'VE TRIED YOUR VERY BEST ,
AND THATS THE BEST YOU CAN GO .
LEAVE NO REGRETS TO IT !
ITS TIME TO MOVE ON SERIOUSLY .
ITS HURT , BUT SOMETIMES PEOPLE DONT LOVE THEIR OWNSELF .
JUST HAVE TO ACCEPT THE FACT ELLA ,
THAT .... DO EXIST !
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Saturday, April 24, 2010
Title; ROCK THE STAGE !
 WE DO IT WELL NUTZCREW !
FROM THE CROWD RESPONSES ,
WE REALLY ROCK THE STAGE .
AND I ENJOYED MYSELF WITH ALL OF YOU AROUND ME .
DANCING AND CHEERING AND ETC ...
AND WE HAD OUR FRIENDLY BATTLE JUST NOW ,
SENIORS VS JUNIORS .
IT WAS A GREAT BATTLE .
I REALLY CANT LEAVE YOU GUYS ,
BUT I HAVE TOO .
NO WORRIES .
I'LL BE COMING BACK IF I HAVE THE TIME AYTE .
PHAT NUTZ AND FRESHES NUTZ ,
YOU GUYS WILL STILL HAVE OUR SUPPORT .
IM GONNA MISS YOU GUYS .
AND ABG JAMYL TOO ,
WHO MAKES A BIG IMPACT TO MY LYFE .
ITS JUST SO HARD FOR ME TO GO JUST LYKE THAT :(
YOU GUYS ARE LYKE ME BROTHERS AND SISTERS .
WE FIGHT BUT WE'RE TOGETHER BACK AGAIN .
JUST LYKE ME AND DIN ,
ME AND FAIZAH ,
ME AND NISA ...
WE DIDNT HOLD ANY GRUDGES ..
LYKE THE MALAY SAID ,
AIR DICENCANG TIADA PUTUS
I LOVE EACH AND EVERYONE OF NUTZCREW !
MWAHHH !!!
IM GONNA HUG EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU ,
BOYS AND GIRLS ,
EVERYONE <3
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Friday, April 23, 2010
Title; ALWAYS IN MY MIND !
 FRIDAY ..
ITS CCA RECOGNATION DAY ,
AND TODAY IS SPEECH DAY !
SENIORS , STEPPING DOWN :(
LETS ROCK THE STAGE LATER NIGHT NUTZCREW !
AND LETS ENJOY OURSELVES ,
FOR THE LAST ONE ..
BUT I BELIEVE THIS NOT GONNA BE THE LAST ONE .
THE SENIORS WILL BE BACK AFTER WE'RE DONE WITH
OUR MAJOR EXAMINATIONS .
EVERY ONE HAS OUR PART TO DO .
LETS DO IT RIGHT ..
KEEP IT ALIVE NUTZCREW !!! <3
FREEKZY NUTZ <3
LIL NUTZ <3
FUNKY NUTZ <3
PHAT NUTZ <3
FRESHES NUTZ <3Labels: NUTZCREW
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Monday, April 19, 2010
Title; save sex for marriage
heyyy !!
i think i miss bloggin so much !
miss expressing my thoughts here .
basically ,
im so tight with my schedule for this whole week .
cuz the Nutzcrew is preparing for our Speech Day this friday .
im so loving our performances !
gonna be SURPRISES for the audience :)
hmm had our rehearsals justnow .
tiring but we enjoyed it as a crew !
thats the most important part :)
well anyways , school really tune me down .
as in studies .
im so stressed up !
i dont know how to describe :(
and im gonna be busy doing the recording and all ...
arghh !!
DANCE.RECORDING.ASPRO.FCGS.
OMCM !!! ( OH MY CHINA MAN )
and this havent includes homeworks , projects ,
my design & technology's journal and artefact !
ARRGGHHH !!!
ouhkay , i really wish i can put everything aside !
but i know all of it will come back to me sooner or later .
so i have no choice :(
and im sure , i have to say goodbye to my saturdays ald :(
im so sadd .....
saturdays no more equals to town :(
saturdays equals to WORK !!
haizzz ...
more responsible-lity as im growing older ..
and im happy that actually Firdaus and i have sort our things out ,
in a gentle and polite manner .
its lyke how we first started .
thank you :)
well , i wanna highlight this point .
SAVE SEX FOR MARRIAGE .
seriously , to my opinion ...
sex should be the ultimate expression of true love
between spouses and should not be treated lightly .
if some has casual sex frequently ,
then sex to this person has no meaning .
it is not something special in a marriage anymore .
so , save sex for marriage !
YOU only have to make a little effort in maintaining the
relationship within its boundaries .
THATS ALL I HAVE TO SAY ..
PEACE .......!!!
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Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Title; HATING MY LYFE TO THE FULLEST :(
 shitttsssss !!
shittss going around me !
im just so fcuked up with it !!
April is really a bad month for me !
eventho my birthday falls on april ..
the beginnin of april is ald turnin really suckyy !
i just cant face it !
its lyke lotsa problems coming to me in one shot !
IN ONE SHOT !!
i just cant face it !
i have no more strength to handle it ...
i feel really down ..
really really down ......... :(
*cryin*
please , i'll prefer if you just go away .
away from me seriously .
you dont have to care for me anymore ,
even if one day i met with an accident ,
dont visit me ,
just go away , far away from me .. :(
im just so sad , very angry , really disappointed !
----------------------------------------
and im really pissed off ,
people with TWO FACES !
really !!!~
no words can describe you all .
TOO OVER !
i dont know ~
i have no strength to continue on ...
im really really am fcukin down .........
just wish that i can confront those people ,
but i have to listen to my respected elder-lyes ...
i just need NUTZCREW only , for now ...Labels: big long haizzzzz
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Thursday, April 8, 2010
Title; NAPHA TEST ...
 my birthday's over :(
SO FASTTT !!!
but eventho its ald 2 days over ,
i still receive presents , thats so touched ......
and i received another 5 presents just now .
you guys are so sweet .. :)
thank you !
had my NAPHA TEST just now .
so tiring !
and morning had my 2.4km run ,
but its just a practice .
my timing was 13mins and how many seconds ..
IM SO PROUD OF MYSELF :)
i hope during the actual one ,
i continue this way or even better timing , hopefully ...
my 5 stations was fcuk ~
and because my birthday has just passed ,
i have to follow the 17 years old girl passing mark ..
pheewwss ~
only my standing broad jump and pull up was sucks ..
the another 3 was perfectly done , for the girl standard :)
INCLINED PULL UPS - 9 ( 2points )
SHUTTLE RUN - 11.1s ( 5points )
SIT UPS - 41 ( 5points )
STANDING BROAD JUMP - 161 ( 1points )
SIT & REACH - 54cm ( 5points )
total were 20 out of 25 points .
shitss i suck in inclined pull ups !
i think because there's blueblacks on my hand ,
thats why very pain you know :P
HEHEHE ! EXCUSES SIAA ELLA !!! :)
and my worst .. standin broad jump !
YEAYY ! TMR FRIDAY !!!
FINISH SCHOOL AT 12.30PM :)
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Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Title; IM 17 YEARS OLD
 HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY TO MY DEAR SELF :D
OMCM !!!!!!!
enter to school and everyone were lyke ,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY , HAPPY BIRTHDAY ..
and all the thing i could say is ,
THANK YOU , THANK YOU AND THANK YOU !
cuz you know , sometymes you dont know how to react when
lotsa people keep on wishing you .
enter canteen , people shouting HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ELLA .
sing a song some more .
well , im speechless .
just a THANK YOU in my head that tyme :)
and all comments i received in facebook ,
messages , offlyne messages .. everything !
thank you so much guys for everything !
each and everyone of you guys meant something in my lyfe :)
AND I RECEIVED 3 CAKES IN A DAY !!
AND OFCOURSE ALL 3 I WISH FOR THE SAME THING ...
and ofcourse not forgetting NUTZCREW !
banyak laa korang nye abg Jamyl nak jumpe !
step pegy prime supermarket lagy !!!
OMCM !
i shall post it what happen-ed actually ..
after our Nutzcrew's meeting at around 2.30pm ,
Akit said lets go to kfc to eat ,
together with Faizah and Erlina ,
since there's no practice for us today .
SO I AGREED TO GO .
but the lame thing is why Nadyra never follow us ?
cuz she's always with us .
Nisa and Amalia too ..
but they said they wanna eat maggy , so i just ignored .
reached to KFC , only Erlina and Faizah's eating .
both me and Akit didnt , cuz ..
maybe its my birthday so , ........ hehe !
AND WE WERE LYKE WASTING TYME IN KFC TRUST ME !
at around 3.15pm , Akit said that Nadyra msg-ed her ,
and said that abg Jamyl wanna see all the girls at 5pm .
as usual , if its at 5pm , we must always report 15mins earlier .
I REMEMBER THAT !
but then Erlina said she wanna pass motion after eating kfc ,
so we waited her in kfc .
soon later , its ald 4.10pm ..
then Faizah said she wanna go PRIME SUPERMARKET .
and we were lyke wasting tyme in that prime !
looking at fish , 'worms' and all .
TAPY BELINYE TIDAK !
then went to sweet area ,.. idk what they're doing !
after that ,
we make our way to school as its ald lyke 4.35pm .
on our way , Akit said ,
lets sit at the pondok area .
but i said lets just go to school cuz im scared if abg Jamyl
gonna scold us ,
cuz its my birthday ... i dont wanna get any scoldings from anyone !
but they insist .
stupid me , i just sit with them , but keep on looking at the tyme .
THERE'S MOSQUITOS AROUND and very lame why they can tahan !
then its lyke 4.55pm ald , i knw we're freakin late ,
and i knw we're gonna get scolded by abg Jamyl :(
then Faizah wanna buy drink some more !!!
macam macam kerenah uh minah ny !
but i just keep my mouth shut cuz Akit said ,
if abg Jamyl scold us , just say her name ..
when we reach-ed school , some of our juniors said ,
'eyy faster2 ! abg jamyl bad mood ..'
i ran lyke its my NAPFA TEST siakk !
when i climbed the stairs , i was takin 2 steps ahead .
at 3rd floor ,
i saw abg Jamyl waiting for the 4 of us .
with his anger face .
then me , with flowers and leafs on my hair !
ouhkay i dont wanna state here how and what he said to us ,
cuz i sound stupid answering those questions .... :(
but after he scolded us ,
he said go inside and do 40 push ups .
I WAS ALL THE WAY TALKING TO MYSELF IN THE HEART !
bad words were non-stop ...
i saw Funkynutz and Freshesnutz were lyke practising .
Alif were teaching them and stuff ,
WITH LIGHTS OFF !!!
but then ,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ......
i heard that song .
i know this gonna be all drama !
so , i didnt do my 40push ups since its all drama :)
abg Jamyl come and hugged me .
BUT I DONT CRY OUHKAY !
IM JUST TOUCHED , so dont say im crying can ...
the cake was cute !
*din.ella*
since yesterdae it was Din's birthday ,
so celebrate together with hym .
pictures pictures pictures !
havent upload yet , lazy !
but THANK YOU NUTZCREW !!
BUAT SUSAH SUSAH JE KORANG :P
then my tuitor gave me a small cake :)
thankyou ..
went home , another cake at around 11.15pm .
asked my brother to cook maggy for me :)
THANK YOU ALL !
AND IM LOVING THE BLUE-BLACKS ON MY BODY AND MY LEFT HAND <3Labels: thank you
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Monday, April 5, 2010
Title; BIRTHDAY AGAIN
 HAPPY 16TH BIRTHDAY TO MUHAMMAD SAFIUDIN !!!
hmm , baru NC16 laa bang :)
and yesterday you guys did super well !
CONGRATULATIONS !
love you guys and may all your wishes come true !
well , get ready for surprises from Nutzcrew tmr :)
alright !
wake up at 6pm justnow .......
and start bathing at 8pm ....
which means i just finished bathing :)
i know this sounds negative but im so tired !
yesterday was on the phone with Faizah till 4.40am .
arrgghh , tmr schoolin :(
homework not done !
and tmr is 6april right ?
geeeee :D
im so excited !!
but im afraid also .
cuz i know im gonna be dead when Nutzcrew meet me tmr :(
SCARY SURPRISES !
havent plus my school mates :'(
but nvm , its once in a year ! :D
LOOKING FORWARD FOR 6 APRIL :D
heeee !
OMCM !
now i realised alot of april babies siaaa !
loves it !
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Sunday, April 4, 2010
Title; BIRTHDAYS
 HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY FADLIE AHMAD .
ALL THE BEST , ENJOY AND TAKE CARE !
LOVE YA !
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Saturday, April 3, 2010
Title; All The Best
 ALL THE BEST TO FREEKZY NUTZ AND FUNKY NUTZ !
for sbdc tmr ...
with all the hardwork ,
i believe you guys will rock the stage ayte .
dont worry too much !
LOVE MY NUTZCREW BOYS ! <3
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Thursday, April 1, 2010
Title; NEW MONTH , NEW LIFE
 it is the 1st of April ,
a new fresh month ,
and i wanna make a new lyfe to myself .
i wanna stop thinking bout you ,
cuz its no point ald .
i know its hard for myself ,
since ive known you for so long ,
and been waiting for you lyke , pheewws ...
but i will try very hard not to bother you anymore .
its pointless when i always tell you your mistakes ,
but you're still the same .
it hurts me alot !
i wanna stop lovin you and i wanna learn how to hate you .
you must not blame me if it happen that one day ,
i hate you super much till i dont even give you a smile ,
cuz all the things i do reflects to your own actions .
i wanna start April as a positive way ,
but because of your actions ,
i have no choice .
i have to be strong !
it cant always be me to give in all the time .
i regretted knowing you sometymes .
but i know i'll be much more regret if ive never ever met you .
hmm i dont know .... :(
also , this new month ,
i want to focus more on my studies .
i will take a break for my dance .
i wanna get nearer to God , and ,
i wanna live in my own world !
thats all .
April just arrived ,
which means my birthday is getting nearer :)Labels: hopefully i really can move on
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ELLA Tamara Bleszynski.
6 april 1993.
West Side.
Juying Secondary School.
O Level This Year.
A Dancer But Being An Actress Is My Biggest Dream.
NUTZCREW repp FunkyNutz.
Red & Adidas Freak !
Single But Unavailable.
